Kathyrn spent the night sitting on the couch, looking at the stars and remembering what happened earlier that night.
She said some things to Chakotay that she thought she had dealt with years ago, but apparently she hadn't. The logical part of her could understand why he left her and fought for the Maquis - it was for his family and family means everything. But she thought that she was part of that family and couldn't understand why he kept her out of the decision. She believed that Chakotay's family must have felt she was family. After all was the person to whom they turned to, to raise Kolpak if anything happen to them. So why couldn't Chakotay see that?
Chakotay sat in his quarters that evening and thought about what happened in Kathryn's quarters earlier.
He knew that his decision to join the Maquis would have hurt her but he felt that he did the right thing, even now. But the hurt in Kathryn's eyes was almost more than he could handle.
He had promised her and himself that he would never hurt her; she had had more pain in her life than anyone should have to go through. As a result of the pain, Kathryn had built an invisible wall around her and almost never showed anyone the real Kathryn Janeway.
Chakotay briefly saw it once when the Ambassador from Narellan visited Starfleet headquarters to discuss the upgrades of the Starfleet base on Narellan. At the time, both Kathryn and Chakotay were station at Starfleet Headquarters and were working together on tactical training and development.
At an official function that they were expected to attend, Chakotay watched from a corner of the room as the Ambassador, Admiral Paris and Kathryn, laughed, joked and teased each other. Normally at these functions, Kathryn would be standing with Chakotay trying to look invisible, just as Chakotay was doing. Chakotay realized then that the Kathryn he thought he knew was in fact a facade that she had built to protect herself and there was a lot more to her.
He remembered wanting to get to know the real Kathryn and set about breaking down the 'wall'. It took him almost two years to do that but once the 'wall' was down, their friendship blossomed into a relationship and he realized that he had found his soul mate.
Michelle and Garak were heading towards Holodeck one where the Sandrine's program was running. Garak had heard about the real Sandrine's on Earth and had thought that it would be an interesting place to visit but never got a chance to do so. A Cardassian on Earth wasn't the best idea.
When he had heard that Tom Paris had programmed Sandrine's on Voyager's databases, he decided that he would visit and see if it was anything like he had been told. Garak asked Michelle to join him for some drinks at Sandrine's and she said yes. He found Michelle totally charming and had enjoyed their conversations so far and wanted to get to know her better. He felt that Michelle, like Kathryn, had managed to see past his fašade, and any person who was able to do that was worth getting to know better.
As they enter Sandrine's, Sandrine herself greeted them. As Sandrine led them to their table, Tom spotted them and waved them over to the table that he was at. Also at the table were B'Elanna, Harry, Seven, Nog, Neelix, and Carey. A lot of the crew was standing around the table, joining in the conversation. Neelix seemed to be asking questions of everyone.
As B'Elanna watched her Captain and Garak walk over to the table, she couldn't help notice Garak's hand on the small of the Captain's back guiding her to the table. She was interested as to why Kathryn liked Garak and allowed him to have a big influence on Kol. But seeing her Captain out in public with Garak was well B'Elanna had to know more. Kathryn and Captain Spencer were B'Elanna's role models There had to be something behind their reasons as to socializing, or being friends with 'any' Cardassian.
"Garak, Neelix was asking about Narellan and what it's like. It's been a while since any of us were there so I was wondering if you could tell Neelix," said Tom.
Garak looked at Tom, then at everyone around the table, then to Neelix and finally to Michelle who gave him a encouraging smile. Garak looked back to Neelix and said, "Well let's see, it's been about a year since I was last there." He was silent for a moment and then said, "Neelix, Narellan is the one place were everyone no matter where you are from, you are welcome. In fact they tend to welcome and accept you as part of the community without question when you have no home. I know that is how I felt and for that matter, the people who lived in the DMZ who found their way there also felt. I think it has something to do with the fact that the people of Narellan were taken from their homes and transported to the planet that they are on now!"
"Sorry for interrupting Mr. Garak, but I was wondering, where did the original inhabitants of Narellan came from?" asked Neelix.
"They came from Earth, Neelix. To be more precise, a small country town in the Australian high country called Narellan," answered Tom.
"Oh!" said Neelix, "So I take it that Commander Janeway's ancestors were from there."
"Actually Neelix, no they weren't, they were from Indiana USA," said Garak.
"Then how did Commander end up on Narellan?" asked Neelix.
Kathryn went to the replicator and ordered four coffee flavored 'Tim Tams' biscuits and a glass of red wine. She then walked back to the couch and sat down. Kathryn was confused and found herself reading the journal she had written when she visited Australia for the first time. The time that she spent there was some of the most rewarding for her. She felt at home and at peace there, it was also the place where she came across 'Tim Tams'. As someone once said, "they are food from the Gods!"
For as long as she could remember, Kathryn had kept a journal. And for as long as she could remember, whenever she felt confused or trouble, she would start reading the entries in her journal. While she never found an answer in the journals, they did make her realize that with the good times, there must be the bad times and that in the end everything will work out. Maybe not the way she wanted it to, but it would work out in the end.
Kathryn had been engaged to a man who worked with her father as part of a Special Forces group. Justin was an Australian but had no family left and since to Kathryn's parents, he was the son that they'd never had. Justin and Kathryn were happy and when they got engaged, Justin wanted to show Kathryn his home country.
Justin was the heir to a large estate in Australia. One of the properties which was part of the estate was a cattle station in the Australian high country. It was Justin's favorite place to visit and wind down from life's pressures.
Kathryn remembered that Justin was so excited to be able to show her 'Tingala' and the township of Narellan. The people of Narellan were like family to Justin and he wanted Kathryn to love the place as much as he did. It was funny how things worked out.
While there, Justin and Kathryn came across a fortuneteller at the local 'Royal Show'. They both had their fortunes read. When the fortuneteller read Kathryn's fortune she first said, "You, my dear, will live a very special life. One that will effect many people, one that will save many people, now and in the future."
The fortuneteller went on to say that there was a man in her life who was her soul mate and that she would be brought forward in time to be with him by the almighty. She also said that there be a lot of trouble and her soul mate and her paths would diverge but they would be brought together again. It would be up to each of them as to whether it will be total happiness or total misery.
At the time, Justin and Kathryn thought nothing of it but now as Kathryn read the entry in her journal she realized that the fortuneteller never meant Justin but in fact meant Chakotay.
"About 6 months later, Justin and Kathryn's father were killed while on assignment. Their deaths affected Kathryn deeply and it took Kathryn's sister Phoebe to make her face reality. Kathryn was Justin's beneficiary and therefore inherited everything that Justin owned, so Kathryn decided to take a job as a Scientist and live a for a time in Australia. The job was close to Narellan so she lived at 'Tingala". That's how she became apart of the Narellan community," said Garak.
"That's such a sad story," said Neelix.
"Yes it is, but Commander Janeway would not like for you to feel pity for her," stated the Doctor.
Garak looked at the Doctor and said, "No, she wouldn't."
At that moment, Chell came into Sandrine's and saw everyone centered around one table and walked up to it, wanting to tell everyone what he overheard. "You are not going to believe this, but it seems the budding relationship we thought was building between Chakotay and Commander Janeway, may have hit an impasse."
"What are you talking about Chell?" said B'Elanna.
"Well, I was walking past Commander Janeway's quarters and overheard her and Chakotay arguing and then I saw Chakotay walk out with a very angry look on his face," said Chell.
Garak turned to Michelle and said, "I am sorry, but I am afraid that I will have to cut short our evening. Nog would you please do my a favor and escort the Captain back to her quarters for me?"
Before Nog had a chance to reply to Garak's request, Michelle said, "Garak, don't you think Kathryn would hate for you to go to her to comfort her? You agreed with the Doctor that she hates it when people feel pity for her, I think the same thing applies here also."
"I'm sorry Garak, but I have to agree with the Captain on this. Kathryn will come to someone when she's ready and not before," said Tom.
Garak sighed and realized that they were right and said, "Okay but if things haven't worked out in a couple of days then I am going to her about it!"
"And I will be going to Chakotay about it. Those two are meant for each other and they would realize it if they just stopped building those damn brick walls," said B'Elanna.
Everyone agreed not to say anything but to watch out for both Kathryn and Chakotay, but most especially for Kol.
To be continue............
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